I got a call this evening from home that a great friend of mine was killed this morning in a car wreck or something. No details. I just hung up. I was crying and I don't know the Spanish to explain to my family why. I just stumbled out into the night and walked to another volunteer's house. I am so thankful for the friends I have made here that sat with me this evening for a couple hours. I barely know them, but they know English and I just needed to be able to sit with someone. I don't have any money so I can't call home. There are so many things I need to do. I feel so helpless and far away. I need to talk to specific people and I just can't. There is no one online right now. All I can do is talk to this void. I don't know how I can go to bed.
They told us we would be too far away and things would happen back home and that it would be heartwrenching and impossible and I didn't think it would happen so soon. Or so awfully. Please someone tell me what to do now. I want unconsciousness. I want this to have not happened. I want to be home and I don't. I want so many things.